Friday, December 20, 2013


Today is the last day of school before Christmas Vacation begins. Sigh. Our tree is up, but not yet decorated. It sits, forlorn and forgotten on the table in the corner where the baby cannot reach it.

J is a bit upset. SHE thinks we should have completely rearranged the incredibly small living room furniture to accommodate the Christmas Tree and put the BIG TREE up.. The BIG TREE has a footprint of roughly 8 feet with branches extended.  Our living room is 15.5 x 15. um. Not happening!!

I think J knows deep in her heart that this is the LAST Christmas where she will actually believe. She is almost 11 & 1/2 years old. Yes, Virginia, she still believes.  We have the damn Elf on the Shelf and I have a stupid alarm on my phone that goes off at 10:30 every night and says "Twinkle Time!"  grrr. I then get out of bed where I was almost asleep and find another place to hide the bloody thing.

Since J is in 7th grade, and really, WHO believes in 7th grade? No one except her. I am going to wrap all the presents this year (in our house, borne of my laziness-Santa presents are NOT wrapped). Each and every present will not appear until Christmas morning, but  ALL of them will say from Meemaw and Pappy.

Yes, her bubble will be burst. Sad.

Funny story. My niece who lives in New Orleans with her Navy husband on base, they have my great nephew X. X is 6 years old. He too, has an Elf on the Shelf. He is a REAL pistol. So my niece who is quite inventive.....and a bit of a pip herself...decided that X's behavior could be improved a bit.

His Elf turned EVIL. Kept getting into trouble!  His Elf, instead of being dressed in the requisite Red and White, suddenly sported a Ninja outfit!!  And at night, that rascal would do things. String toilet paper all over the stairs. Take all of X's toys in the playroom and mix them up!  Change out Army men to BARBIES!! Hide his Skylander collection in the GARBAGE CAN!!

After two weeks of  evil alternate personality, my niece called the North Pole, and was told by Santa himself that if X improved HIS behavior, the Elf would correspondingly do the same. There is apparently a precedent set, and rules. You have to TOUCH the Elf to re-activate his magic, and solemnly swear to be a better boy, to try harder to be good. Lo! and Behold!! Evil Elf turned back into Elf on the Shelf.

I thought it was hilarious. Of course, I am a bit warped.

S has settled down. She survived her grounding.

J is a bit snarky lately.

M is still a good mom, but spends all her time when M1 is sleeping also sleeping on the couch. If I ask her to get up and run sweeper, etc., she will do it. Yesterday, I almost fell off my chair. She did it WITHOUT being told!!

That is a pretty big deal for a schizophrenic.  Even though she is well maintained on her meds, the LAST thing to come around is personal hygiene, organizational skills and social skills. Yes, I still have to tell her "it's time to bath the baby", and things like that. I have to tell her M, it has been almost a week since you showered or changed clothes. M, it's time to do your laundry.

It's rather like having 4 teenage girls and a  baby, even though M is almost 25.  That is mental illness. If you don't live with it, you don't really understand.

Again, it is what it is.

M1 continues to be a delightful baby, happy and very independent. she is About to take her FIRST STEP. Any minute now. She has 'let go' a couple of times, which I suppose would have counted, but she quickly grabbed for the nearest couch, wall or finger. LOL.

I am not quite as tired. I think my body just sort of....goes on strike occasionally. My body knows when I am at the line approaching my end. And it just quits. I have no energy, and it is all I can do to clean the kitchen, cook dinner. I don't even want to run errands or shop.

Really, all I want to do is sleep. But, I have found throughout the years, that my body seems to know what is best for itself, and that if I indulge it, I get better quicker.

I did manage to sort through and clean the girls rooms. I also told them this is absolutely the LAST TIME I will ever do so.

If I have to go up again, it all goes in a trash bag. Computers, cell phones, tablets, whatever. And I will not pick up the garbage either. They will just have nothing anymore to clean.

DH isn't crazy about that, being as how we PAID for all of those expensive electronic items. But still, if you don't lose, you don't VALUE?

J is getting a new laptop for Christmas. Only because I snagged one at the Black Friday sale. Our budget per child is only $200 each for Christmas for the full time kidlets, and $50 per for the part timers, or grands who do not live with us.  That doesn't seem like much, and truthfully, it's not. But it's what we CAN afford. I refuse to overspend.

J had a laptop, handed down several times. The wireless card broke down, I went and purchased a Belkin USB wireless adapter.  Her little sister K broke it last week. J is quite upset. I told her I do not have the $69 to go out and buy her a new one! I told her if her computer was valued, she would not 1. have left it on the floor, 2. asked a 6 year old to pick it up and put it away thereby damaging the USB thingy sticking out one side of it.

Hopefully, she got the lesson?

Grades are good. S ended up with a 3.0 in her University class. she now has 18 credits and will finish her Freshman year in May.  Her high school grades are averaging a 3.8 GPA. How weird that she will graduate High School at 16, and enter her Senior year in University at 17 years and 18 days? But hey, the high school pays the tuition so it's saving us a shitload of money in tuition!!!

J is carrying a 3.5 in Advanced Placement classes in 7th grade. Well, except that she missed a sign language final on 26 Nov (because I kept them home to bake for Thanksgiving) and even though it was an 'excused absence' the teacher is out on medical until 6 Jan.  So that grade shows an F. J of course, TWEAKED. I called counselor and was re-assured that teacher will be back before grades close (15 Jan) and will be able to make up test with no penalty. Thank you Lord!! That child freaks out if her GPA drops below 3.5.

I have this knack of spending almost exactly what cash I have in my wallet. LOL. I thought I had like the last $200 and we were pretty much out of food. I went to Aldi's. It came to $166.93. I opened my wallet thinking "hey, I have like almost $30 left!! WHOOP WHOOP!  Only to find I had 169 in my wallet. Forgot that I had 1. paid a doctor bill and 2. bought my prescription (which have risen exponentially since ACA, thanks Obama).  What I used to pay $5.00 for now costs me $27.

Anyway, we have food, hopefully enough to get through till we get paid the 31st.

Christmas presents are already purchased and safely ensconced in my closet. So there is really nothing left to do. Scraped by again this year. Makes me yearn for the years when we had money in the bank, but alas and alack!! those days are long gone.

Update on my South African girl, the one who was in Afghanistan and addicted to heroin. She successfully went cold turkey there, waited until she got leave (civilian job) and went home. Told her parents, and voluntarily entered a 90 day rehab program to nail down her sobriety. She is doing well. She quit the job (I told her there is just no way you can go back to Afghanistan), and is now working in S.A. which is a HUGE thing as their unemployment is about 25%. Her family was very supportive. I am very proud of her!!

I was contacted two days ago by a young woman in Australia. she is married to a junkie and has an almost 1 year old daughter. She asked if there was any hope. I had to tell her that the BABY comes first, child services would most certainly get involved, and she could actually lose custody of her daughter, who is her entire world (as it should be).  The husband's own mother won't have anything to do with him, he is preying on his wife. Stealing money, etc.

I told her in my opinion the only safe thing she can do is cut him loose. She said, but he will be  homeless. I said oh Honey. NO junkie is EVER without resources!! Trust me, if they can get dope, they can find a place to sleep. LOL. We have all been there!  I also told her that you cannot LOVE a junkie clean. Sigh. She said she was going to print out my letter and carry it with her to give her strength in the times when she would be tempted to listen to the lies. That made me feel good.

Sometimes, I do hate that I have been on the internet for 20 years. Yet, here are two women, who have been helped in one year, so I guess really it is a blessing in disguise.


  1. you changed my life and supported me through the tough times! you are a blessing!! Much SA Love!!

    1. Thanks love!! That means a lot to me <3